I listen to a lot of podcasts.  Apparently this is a “thing” for us Enneagram 1’s. I love learning and being introduced to new and challenging ideas and I consume so much more information this way. In the shower, putting on my makeup, traveling, whenever and wherever I can, I’m listening to something from my feed.  It was on one of my favorite podcasts a couple years ago when I first heard a concept that resonated deeply with me. The interview was with Jen Freitas, the Director of People, Learning + Engagement at Clif Bar .  She argued, like many, that work/life balance is like seeing a leprechaun riding a unicorn.  But that what does exist, is a work/life cocktail.  Some family time and some work, mixed with with a splash of friends, a twist of vacation and a dash of volunteering.  On the rocks.  Shaken not stirred. 

I don’t know if I should be concerned that I connected so deeply at the sound of a cocktail?  Maybe I was just listening to this on an evening drive home and was ready to unwind?  Regardless, it just made so. much. sense.  For example, as I write this, it is 9:59 on a Friday night.  To many this might seem “out of balance”.  I should be unwinding, or bingeing Netflix with my husband, or out with some girlfriends.  I certainly shouldn’t be working on my side hustle.  That’s not balanced.  On the other hand, this weekend I’m heading to LA for a girls weekend to attend our church’s annual women’s conference.  Also not balanced.

Here’s what I love about the cocktail vs. balance.  A work/life cocktail allows you to run hard after whatever opportunity is present in the moment.  If you are sprinting on a work project, be a freaking BA and get it done!  If everything is chill + easy at the moment, for the love, enjoy it!  If family must take priority for any number of legit reasons, lean into that.  Don’t try to balance the family time by pulling out your laptop and don’t feel like you have to justify the chill by manufacturing some work crisis.  

The thing about the concept of “balance” is that it makes me feel like everything has to be happening in equal parts at all times. ⚖️ Since this just isn’t humanly possible it inevitably leads to guilt about whatever is not in balance.  When I think about it, my average day is so much more of a cocktail than perfectly balanced scales: early morning workout or Bible study, kids wake up then it’s mom time with breakfast, kitchen cleaning, getting dressed and out the door, then it’s work mixed in with maybe a grocery run during my lunch break, or if the morning work out didn’t happen an afternoon workout, or a Dr’s appointment, or one meeting after another until pick up time when it’s back to momming until bedtime at which point I may hop back on the laptop or watch my latest Netflix binge or catch up with Ryan or… make myself a cocktail. 🍸

Afterall, you can only find balance when you’re standing still and clearly there’s not much of that happening around here!

Be free my friends.  Don’t get sidelined by the guilt of balance.  Embrace the fluidity of life.